Some of this is True

expected to arrive
at invitation
six p.m.
for all my preparations
I was tied up
in a noose

(having never met before)
observing trite societal decor
would he feel predisposed
to offer his hand
to mine, to close
the gap between
awkward introductions
as if to say
hello?

as first impressions go
(and I’ll admit I’m quite opposed)
that these
obnoxious behaviors
be agreed upon at whim
would it be rude of me
to say
(summoning my best
high-brow, silk soled snoot)
“A hand-shaker,
good hells,
you’re one of those.”
(?)

my girlfriend would understand
though I could simply there
just shake his hand
and ask to see
the restroom
when we’re through

but that again
might be seen as rude
to assume upon
brief interlude
with a presumption
over hospitality
could I then,

discreetly conceal
hand sanitizer
in my pocket
to use in a moment
of secrecy
or, when the evenings end
were finally reached
to liberate myself
as per my need?

all this pacing, back and forth
and I’d not decided
which way was worse
might it be possible
to be discouraging
from the first?

before I’d got it
right way round
we were at the doorstep
(girlfriend,
and I
was positively frightened)

the door opened, and
before I was offered anything
I stuck out my hand
open palm, looked up
at him
and blurted out
“hepatitis!”

no,
this made things worse.
(she read this and said “Baby,
please don’t.”)

© Emerys Watchel, 2015 All rights reserved.

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