the irregular dream

upon a time
once
i used to think to myself
to think to
myself
i’d stare at my shoes
and consider the spherical
earth
underneath
the toil the toil
and the preachers would preach
while the evangelists scream
feeding the body of christ
to open mouths among rows
of graves
dying to be filled
what does it all mean?

this is no way to begin
Once
upon a time
i would run i would run
and build my castles in trees
i’d chase butterfly princesses
and pull
the kicking legs from grasshoppers
for the anthill machines
it wasn’t their fault
wasn’t their
fault
they couldn’t help the impossible need
to attack the anomaly
with an irrational hatred
thresh, thresh
disappear the irregular
and return to
familiar
business
as
usual
again, Once

i thought it important to grow
to a man
and to have
a woman and responsibility
and a place in the social
order of things
and the closer i got
the harder it seemed
to want and to want
what i
couldn’t
be

Once
it all was and would be
it still is and i
dream the irregular
dream

© Emerys Watchel, 2017 All rights reserved.

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