M,

i think about you
r body
laying before mine
squirming thighs wanting
to spread wet
shaved of hair
sad eyes
begging

i’m up nights with
this
apparition
recapturing your
eyes
hips in my hands
my name
on
your breath

© Emerys Watchel, 2017 All rights reserved.

mitigating damages

i was a small boy
w/a big heart that invited evil
awkward
in the way that children often are
when they’re abused
the problem isn’t the anger
or the authority of a father’s punishment
rebellion is not a simple act
it’s complicated
by the problem
of right
when you are taught what you are taught
and your instructor does
not uphold his own scripture
coping with this duplicity
takes on forms
that resemble violence

they are actions
intended
to give answers to difficult
questions

i don’t talk about it
because
i don’t want to come off as a person
with daddy issues i do not have
he was a simple man
and i’ve forgiven him for that

there was a time
i wanted him dead. i
harboured dungeons of torture
and retribution, and placed him there
in various poses of agony
and it helped
to get through another day
i fixated on death
and needed to understand it
so, i killed chickens
and flung them up into the barn loft
the powers of life and death
were mine
and i would choose
give it a good whack
with a sturdy stick
and feel the fear come over it
they would beg you
to stop
if they could
and
there is a point
where they resign themselves to this fate
that you’ve decided
just before
they become lifeless

the barn began to smell of decay
mixed in with manure
and dry straw
pungent in a sweet-smelling way
that space was mine
and i would climb up there
stand among the carcasses
in the orange afternoon
when the sun was low
and yellow beams would pierce
the timber
making pillars of light
in the dust

it helped
one day it stopped
and had all but been forgotten
sometimes
now
when the smell of dried grass
mixes with manure
i remember that space
and the darkness i’d created
the evil invited

and it helps
though i do not dwell
anymore

© Emerys Watchel, 2017 All rights reserved.

public solitude

the internet is a pernicious entity
that moves with intent. a mass
without brain, or form
it behaves as an amoeba, absorbing
dissolving through scrutiny,
persuasion,
deceit
it is a product of human intervention
in this manner it is
perfect
as we perceive perfection. indomitable,
unassailable
though neither evil, nor good

as we wish our selves to be
right, loud, brilliant
though these are vacuumes that create
ignorance

that’s the problem with irony
we find ourselves in that
disgusting,
impotent,

wrong.
group-thought, or mass thought
is a byproduct of bias
ergo: not individual by design,
not persuaded by evidence
mob-
mentality
is desirous of gore, drama, noise
the disembowelment of another
for animalistic pleasure,
de-constructive by design. quite
possibly
our truest natural inclination

with a glaringly obvious flaw
as a human creation
dreamt of in human consciousness
motivated by human ego
it
is
programmable
Global Media Networks know
& understand this

the internet is Their crybaby
Their tool

unplug
once in a while
use your imagination

escape

© Emerys Watchel, 2017 All rights reserved.

Perception

ocean through the pines
whistling
with the hiss of sun-hot
stones
& rain
splotch on the hollow sinew
of croaking toad-
meat mucosal eyelids peering
to the mountain’s summit
where the puffy egg-sac clouds skate
in bulbous cloister
gathering at the high atmosphere
near
the water’s edge

author’s note:
because we metabolize water molecules
at this density
we live
on what we call
land

© Emerys Watchel, 2017 All rights reserved.

what is Healthy Lifestyle?

the couple behind me
chatter
about nonsense lawn & home
building a new gardenshed
Wife encourages Husband
her hand on his arm,
her eyes
staring
through his ear
“it’s a pretty cool idea.”
loud enough that the other attended poor
can hear
their descent from money
“we don’t belong here.”
is
what i hear them saying
“we are dissimilar from these
disgusting animals.”

obvious
inhuman
programs

© Emerys Watchel, 2017 All rights reserved.